Holy heaviness

Mia weighs over 27 pounds! She is one tall chunky monkey!

Books

Grace and Sarah LOVE books. In fact, the prospect of going to a book store or down the aisle of books in Costco or Sam's Club thoroughly excites them. Bedtime always consists of a minimum of at least two books, but usually three or four. They cannot go to bed unless they are read to. I love the fact that they love books. In elementary school, when the yearly book fair would come, I would take my money, and buy as many books as I could. The feeling of pure excitement would rush through me as I browsed all of those books. It was so great, and I'll always remember how much joy books gave me when I was a kid. I am happy that our girls have that same love for books as I did.

Dippy Sauce

All of my children love dippy sauce. Preferably ranch dippy sauce. Tonight, GJ took me, Grace, Sarah, Mia and Abby to Islands Restaurant. Mia was being her usual attention-getter, screaming and the like, until the french fries arrived with the dippy sauce. After that, she was quiet as a mouse, thoroughly enjoying every ranch-covered french fry bite. Like mother, like daughter.

Happy Birthday, Grace and Sarah!

I can't believe you are five years old! The last five years have been the best of our lives. Thank you for being the most amazing, wonderful, sweet, smart, funny girls. You have come a long way!
From this:


To this:


Thank you, God, for your wonderful blessings!

Five years ago today

My twin babies were born five years ago today! The morning was quite uneventful, and at the time, I had no idea that before midnight that night, they were to be born, so cruelly taken from my belly 11 weeks early. All day long, my urine was collected and was to be turned in later in the afternoon. At around 5:00pm, this humongous jug of urine was sent off to the lab for testing. Carey had arrived around that time and we were just hanging out. After 10:00 that night, as Carey was just getting ready to go home, Dr. Henderson and Dr. Buchanan solemnly walked in my hospital room with very serious expressions on their faces. They proceeded to tell us that the lab results came in and the protein levels in my urine were astronomically high, along with my blood pressure, and to save the life of the girls as well as my own, they had to be delivered right away. After that, it was a gigantic whirlwind. An ultrasound machine was wheeled in to check the position of the girls, and the nurses began prepping me for surgery. I was then wheeled into the operating room where a gigantic team of doctors and nurses awaited the arrival of my tiny little babies. Surgery began as Carey stood by my side, holding my hand while watching the blood pressure monitor read 220/140. My body was going haywire! Grace Helena was born at 11:16pm, weighing 2 pounds, 16 ounces and was 14 1/2 inches long. She didn't cry. She was immediately whisked away to the NICU and was intubated, surviving on a ventilator. Sarah Lauren was born just one minute later at 11:17pm. She cried! The nurses wrapped her up and showed her to me for one quick second, where she opened her eyes and looked at me as if to say "I'm going to be okay, Mom." I'll never forget that moment. Then she, too, was taken away to the NICU. It would be almost two days until I would see my babies again, as my blood pressure remained sky high. Carey frequently went to check on the girls and updated me with their progress, but there's little of that that I remember.

Back to the hospital!

In the morning, after my horrible night of sleep, I called Dr. Gray's office at the nurses urging. It was March 24, 2002. I was to let my doctor know that I had been in the hospital for the past three days, and I was to give him the rundown of what happened and what drugs I had been given. I was told to come in at 2:00 that afternoon. My mom drove me there, and I specifically remember walking down the hallway at a snail's pace. I could barely walk, and me entire body was hugely swollen. I looked like the Stay-Puf Marshmallow. As I always did at the beginning of my OB appointments, I peed into a little cup so they could check my urine for protein. Not long after, I was escorted into the room, and a huge bomb was dropped on me. I had high levels of protein in my urine, which is a sign of pre-eclampsia, also known as toxemia, and I was to go back to the hospital. Dr. Gray pressed his finger into my shin, and my skin stayed indented. Another sign of this disease. I had gained over 20 pounds in a week and a half, mostly water weight. Another sign.
I just couldn't believe it. I had just been sent home from the hospital. I didn't want to go back there. In the biggest crocodile tears, I walked my snail's pace over to Labor and Delivery and was checked in. At that time, Dr. Henderson was the on-call doctor. He reviewed my case and informed me that I wasn't going home. "You may deliver in 12 hours or 12 days, but you're not going home." My heart sank.

Birthday Party Time!

Today we had the girls' 5th birthday party at Build-a-Bear in Downtown Disney. Emily, Abby, Austin, Alyssa, Kylee, Sydney, Jacob, Andrew, and Sheridan came to celebrate with Grace and Sarah. All of the kids were able to make their own bear and choose outfits for their bears. Everybody seemed to have a great time, especially the guests of honor.
Tomorrow, Grace and Sarah will be five! We just can't believe how fast the past five years have flown. It seems like yesterday when we were holding those little two-pounders in our arms. Tomorrow is going to be a great day for all of us!

Released!

I was released from the hospital today five years ago. It was March 24, 2002, and my contractions had stopped. I was directed to go on complete bedrest, which I was totally okay with. I just wanted my babies to stay there, cozy in my belly. I'd do anything to keep them there. Upon release, I noticed that I was quite swollen all over my body. I asked the nurse what that could be, and she told me it's probably because I had been in bed for three days. Nothing else was mentioned about my extreme swelling, and I had no idea that bloating like that is a sign of pre-eclampsia setting in. I went home and went straight to bed, and had a horrible night of sleep. If I only had known that in a mere 48 hours, my precious, teeny tiny babies were to be born.

Missed my baby shower

Five years ago today, on Saturday, March 23, 2002, I was still in the hospital being treated for contractions. The doctors had already given me my first round of steroid shots and I was to have another shot that day. I was still on Magnesuim Sulfate, one horror of a drug, and I was awaiting the results of a test called the Fetal Fibronectin test. This test predicts with some accuracy if delivery is most likely going to happen within two weeks. I was hoping and praying for this test to be negative, all the while being so worried about keeping my babies in my tummy. The neonatal doctor came in my room that day to let me know how well 29 weeker babies fare, and the news wasn't so good. Breathing problems, vision problems, bleeding on the brain, cerebral palsy....the list was so long. I was scared. And because I was so scared and the only thing on my mind was those two little girls in my tummy, my thoughts were not focused on my baby shower that was scheduled for that afternoon. Invitations had been sent out over three weeks prior, and it was too overwhelming to think of how to contact everyone and tell them not to come. I told everybody to just have the shower without me. And they did! Everybody came, not knowing that the guest of honor, me, was going to be absent. They ate, drank, and had a merry time opening my gifts. Near the tail end of the shower, I got the news that I was hoping and praying for....the fetal fibronectin test was NEGATIVE! That meant that I shouldn't be delivering those babies for at least two more weeks. I was elated! In the late afternoon, the magnesuim sulfate was turned off, and I started to feel better. The contractions had slowed considerably, and I was one happy mom-to-be. Little did I know, that much, much later, after the girls were born, I would cry many, many tears of sadness because I missed my baby shower. And little did I know that I had only 72 hours left of being pregnant, that my world would soon come crashing down.

Today five years ago

Five years ago today, at one o'clock in the morning, I was admitted to the hospital for contractions. I had been experiencing some contractions for the previous few days and had been in the hospital overnight on the 19th of March. After that visit, I was given a drug to stop the contractions, which worked for a few days. But on this day, Friday, March 22, 2002, the contractions weren't stopping. They weren't very frequent, maybe six or so an hour, but because I was carrying twins and a twin pregnancy is considered high risk, they had me come in. When I arrived I was very scared, nervous, and tired. Right away, I was hooked up to monitors and given more medication to stop the contractions. This time the medicine didn't work, so I was put on a strong medicine called Magnesium Sulfate. Now that is one nasty drug! At this time, the doctors decided to give me my first of two rounds of steroid shots to speed up the development of the babies' lungs, as they didn't know if I'd be delivering or not. The doctors gave me a few tests, and I learned that I had a couple of infections, which were treated with antibiotics. The docs said that these infections could be the cause of the contractions, which gave me a tad bit of relief. I stayed in the hospital that entire day on the Magnesium Sulfate, waiting for those contractions to stop. But as of Friday night, they were still coming and going.

To be continued...

I love you

Sarah: "I love you."

Me: "I love you more!"

Sarah: "I love you to the sun and back and to the moon and back and the whole wide world."

Melt my heart, little one!

Permanently Bent

Sarah will NOT move her arm. It looks as if it's permanently bent, kind of like she has this invisible cast on her arm. So yesterday, we went back to see the surgeon, as we are concerned that she hasn't straightened it out yet and it's been two weeks since the cast came off. At the doctor's office, her arm was re-xrayed, and Dr. Aminian reassured me that the bones have healed nicely and there appears to be no physical reason why she can't bend her arm. He feels as though it's all mental with her, that she's mostly just afraid. He added that the joint is probably stiff, but she should be able to move it more. So we go back in two weeks, and if she is still not straightening her arm out, he'll send her to physical therapy.

Cast is off!

Sarah FINALLY got her cast off, after a mere three weeks of that "boring" thing. When we first arrived, we were directed toward the pediatric wing of the orthopaedic doctor's office, camera in tow. The nurse began cutting Sarah's cast off, as I am crazily snapping pictures for that perfect layout.


After the boring thing came off, we got our first glimpse of the three pins that had been holding Sarah's broken bones together.



We had an even better glimpse, after her arm was X-rayed. Wow.


Dr. Aminian came in, checked the x-ray, and promptly said, "Look's good, let's get those pins out." I held Sarah tightly and had her look toward me while the doctor yanked those pins out in no time. As you can see, Sarah really enjoyed this part.


Her arm was quickly wrapped up, and we were sent on our way! The promise of going to Target to get an Icee and a toy halted those tears and made Sarah one happy little girl.

Cast coming off today!

Today we are going to see Sarah's surgeon, where he will take her cast off, pull the pins out, and re-xray her bones. If her arm healed well, she's not supposed to get another cast on. So our fingers are crossed! She is very excited to get that thing off her arm! We'll have to see how well her fingers are functioning after the cast is removed, but as of now, she can't bend her thumb or forefinger into a fist. I'm going to ask the doctor about getting her some physical therapy to make those nerves reconnect. Be back later!

My three cuties

How gorgeous are these three little darlings?


We are so blessed!